Wade Belak found dead

[cw]

Autoerotic asphyxiation has crossed my mind (only because he seemed so well adjusted.) Though that in itself isn't exactly a well adjusted" thing to do I suppose...

It crossed my mind as well though I was reluctant to raise it. It may be something we'll never know.

 

[crazyperfectdevil]

Autoerotic asphyxiation has crossed my mind (only because he seemed so well adjusted.) Though that in itself isn't exactly a well adjusted" thing to do I suppose...

It crossed my mind as well though I was reluctant to raise it. It may be something we'll never know.

i have to say..i'd rather it was that then suicide ....death by misadventure ..while tragic ...doesn't paint the picture of his last moments being of isolation and depression ...  anyway... moot point

 

[maplesyrup]

Autoerotic asphyxiation has crossed my mind (only because he seemed so well adjusted.) Though that in itself isn't exactly a well adjusted" thing to do I suppose...

It crossed my mind as well though I was reluctant to raise it. It may be something we'll never know.

Yeah, we'll likely never know but strangely, this is the thing that makes the most sense to me. The whole thing is just so bizarre. 

 

[bustaheims]

Yeah, we'll likely never know but strangely, this is the thing that makes the most sense to me. The whole thing is just so bizarre.

Yeah. That might be the only way to really make sense of it. It wasn't something that crossed my mind, but, now that you've brought it up, it does make a fair amount of sense. He certainly wouldn't be the first person to end up going that way.

 

[Jacques Strap]

Autoerotic asphyxiation has crossed my mind (only because he seemed so well adjusted.) Though that in itself isn't exactly a well adjusted" thing to do I suppose...

It crossed my mind as well though I was reluctant to raise it. It may be something we'll never know.

Yeah, we'll likely never know but strangely, this is the thing that makes the most sense to me. The whole thing is just so bizarre.

Yeah, add me to the list of those that wondered about that as well.... when you hear the accounts and memories of Wade, from folks that spent a lot of time with him, you have to think that if he had demons, that he was masterful at keeping them from others. Out of the three enforcers that died this summer, this one is not like the others.

 

[Corn Flake]

Maybe Wade was vulnerable and covered it up by clowning all the time.

Its what I was thinking as well.  Many a comedian will tell you that a lot of them are some of the more depressed people around. Wade could have been just the same. 

 

[ZBBM]

Maybe Wade was vulnerable and covered it up by clowning all the time.

Its what I was thinking as well.  Many a comedian will tell you that a lot of them are some of the more depressed people around. Wade could have been just the same.

It wouldn't surprise me.  Especially his penchant for self-depreciating humor ... can be a sign of a very strong, healthy personality, or else a coping mechanism for very low self-esteem.

But we'll never know unless the family decides to share information not known to the public, and it's none of our business to know if they choose not to.  My heart goes out to his family, and particularly his little girls. 

 

[chestyleroux]

Autoerotic asphyxiation has crossed my mind (only because he seemed so well adjusted.) Though that in itself isn't exactly a well adjusted" thing to do I suppose...

It crossed my mind as well though I was reluctant to raise it. It may be something we'll never know.

Yeah, we'll likely never know but strangely, this is the thing that makes the most sense to me. The whole thing is just so bizarre.

Yeah, add me to the list of those that wondered about that as well.... when you hear the accounts and memories of Wade, from folks that spent a lot of time with him, you have to think that if he had demons, that he was masterful at keeping them from others. Out of the three enforcers that died this summer, this one is not like the others.

Not trying to be a Debbie-downer, but wouldn't his death have been reported as accidental in that case instead of a suicide?

 

[Corn Flake]

Maybe Wade was vulnerable and covered it up by clowning all the time.

Its what I was thinking as well.  Many a comedian will tell you that a lot of them are some of the more depressed people around. Wade could have been just the same.

It wouldn't surprise me.  Especially his penchant for self-depreciating humor ... can be a sign of a very strong, healthy personality, or else a coping mechanism for very low self-esteem.

But we'll never know unless the family decides to share information not known to the public, and it's none of our business to know if they choose not to.  My heart goes out to his family, and particularly his little girls.

True, but in light of all the disrespectful details that have been published (by the Sun and then a few other outlets), suggesting how it happened it would be nice to know a bit of the real story.  A bit of closure for the fans, in some sense.

 

[maplesyrup]

Autoerotic asphyxiation has crossed my mind (only because he seemed so well adjusted.) Though that in itself isn't exactly a well adjusted" thing to do I suppose...

It crossed my mind as well though I was reluctant to raise it. It may be something we'll never know.

Yeah, we'll likely never know but strangely, this is the thing that makes the most sense to me. The whole thing is just so bizarre.

Yeah, add me to the list of those that wondered about that as well.... when you hear the accounts and memories of Wade, from folks that spent a lot of time with him, you have to think that if he had demons, that he was masterful at keeping them from others. Out of the three enforcers that died this summer, this one is not like the others.

Not trying to be a Debbie-downer, but wouldn't his death have been reported as accidental in that case instead of a suicide?

Not necessarily. I'm not sure what the police know/suspect and what is reported are always (or need to be) the same thing. 

 

[Corn Flake]

Autoerotic asphyxiation has crossed my mind (only because he seemed so well adjusted.) Though that in itself isn't exactly a well adjusted" thing to do I suppose...

It crossed my mind as well though I was reluctant to raise it. It may be something we'll never know.

Yeah, we'll likely never know but strangely, this is the thing that makes the most sense to me. The whole thing is just so bizarre.

Yeah, add me to the list of those that wondered about that as well.... when you hear the accounts and memories of Wade, from folks that spent a lot of time with him, you have to think that if he had demons, that he was masterful at keeping them from others. Out of the three enforcers that died this summer, this one is not like the others.

Not trying to be a Debbie-downer, but wouldn't his death have been reported as accidental in that case instead of a suicide?

I think to this point, according to the police, its being "treated as" a suicide.  It hasn't been fully concluded as that, at least not until the autopsy is finished.  Micheal  Hutchence of INXS went this way and it was initially ruled suicide as well (if faded memory serves).

 

[cw]

Autoerotic asphyxiation has crossed my mind (only because he seemed so well adjusted.) Though that in itself isn't exactly a well adjusted" thing to do I suppose...

It crossed my mind as well though I was reluctant to raise it. It may be something we'll never know.

Yeah, we'll likely never know but strangely, this is the thing that makes the most sense to me. The whole thing is just so bizarre.

Yeah, add me to the list of those that wondered about that as well.... when you hear the accounts and memories of Wade, from folks that spent a lot of time with him, you have to think that if he had demons, that he was masterful at keeping them from others. Out of the three enforcers that died this summer, this one is not like the others.

Not trying to be a Debbie-downer, but wouldn't his death have been reported as accidental in that case instead of a suicide?

I think to this point, according to the police, its being "treated as" a suicide.  It hasn't been fully concluded as that, at least not until the autopsy is finished.  Micheal  Hutchence of INXS went this way and it was initially ruled suicide as well (if faded memory serves).

I haven't seen that exactly. I've seen misleading headlines and comments suggesting that but that's not precisely what the police are saying:

http://www.nesn.com/2011/09/source-former-nhl-enforcer-wade-belak-hanged-himself.html
"At this point it's non-suspicious," Toronto police spokesman Tony Vella said Thursday. "We will not provide any further information on a non-suspicious case."

I've also seen reports that the police are still investigating.

The problem with trying to distinguish between suicide by hanging and accidental death by autoerotic asphyxiation is that they can present themselves in a similar way. In Keith (David, not Keith Carradine -LHF ) 
Carradine's case, he had also bound his genitals so it was a little more clear cut something kinky was going on (ignoring other conspiracy theories and lawsuits about his death).

Apparently, the way some people a few hundred years back got on to autoerotic asphyxiation was that they observed similar events when some (not all) criminals got hung: erection and ejaculation. It's also been observed with some sudden severe head injuries causing death.

So the police may be able conclude at this point that it was likely a self inflicted death and therefore, "not suspicious" but they may have a chicken and egg problem on their hands when trying to pin down if it was accidental depending on the evidence and circumstances. There have apparently been a number of cases where it was originally thought to be suicide that they later concluded as an accidental death by autoerotic asphyxiation - particularly with younger men.

Again, we, the family and the police may never know what really happened though the latter two parties may figure it out from the evidence and never tell us.

As to your earlier point about many comedians having a darker side and struggling with mental issues and depression, I've seen articles/reports on that and agree that it's quite possible and more common than many folks realize. Comedian Red Skelton's struggle with depression was one of the first that seemed to trigger that discussion that I can recall though I expect those characteristics have probably been around for as long as man has existed as a defence mechanism.

EDIT: Here's another recently reported article:
http://winnipeg.ctv.ca/servlet/an/local/CTVNews/20110901/wade-belak-death-110901/20110901/?hub=WinnipegHome
Police are tight-lipped about the circumstances surrounding the death of Wade Belak, the former NHL enforcer who was found dead in a Toronto hotel on Wednesday afternoon.
...
A day after his body was found, Toronto police are saying only that his death is "non-suspicious" in nature and that foul play is not suspected.

 

[Kin]

As to your earlier point about many comedians having a darker side and struggling with mental issues and depression, I've seen articles/reports on that and agree that it's quite possible and more common than many folks realize. Comedian Red Skelton's struggle with depression was one of the first that seemed to trigger that discussion that I can recall though I expect those characteristics have probably been around for as long as man has existed as a defence mechanism.

Just if anyone wants to look into this issue there are a couple of really great podcasts that deal with the issues of mental health from a comedian's perspective that can be really illuminating and helpful. The first is

WTF with Marc Maron

It's basically just interviews with comedians. Some of them are pretty pleasant and uplifting but there are some really great ones about people dealing with their struggles. The ones with Todd Hanson, Dave Foley and Robin Williams are particularly good.

Then The Mental Illness Happy Hour is another really good, frank discussion about these issues with some funny people.

 

[maplesyrup]

Belak on playing on the top line; ?I should be good for about 30 goals, 40 assists this season. I figure that's about 100 points.?  ;D

 

[riff raff]

The thing about comedians and their darker side is that after the fact there is generally someone who steps forward and talks about their demons or whatever - that the way they appeared on stage was not how they were continuously.

With Belak every single person who knew him is shocked. Nobody can reconcile this with the person they knew.

 

[cw]

Statement from Jennifer Belak
http://predators.nhl.com/club/news.htm?id=587639
Nashville, Tenn. (September 1, 2011) ? The following statement was released today by Jennifer Belak:

?We are overwhelmed and deeply touched by the outpouring of compassion and support since Wade's passing. Wade was a big man with an even bigger heart. He was a deeply devoted father and husband, a loyal friend and a well respected athlete. This loss leaves a huge hole in our lives and, as we move forward, we ask that everyone remember Wade?s infectious sense of humor, his caring spirit and the joy he brought to his friends, family and fans. The coming days will be very difficult for our family and we respectfully ask that we be allowed to grieve privately.?

In lieu of flowers the family will accept donations to The Andie and Alex Belak Scholarship Fund. Checks may be made payable to Woodmont Christian Church/Belak (3601 Hillsboro Pike, Nashville, TN 37215).

Private services will be held Sunday, Sept. 4 at 2 p.m. at Woodmont Christian Church (3601 Hillsboro Pike, Nashville, TN 37215).

 

[Tigger]

The thing about comedians and their darker side is that after the fact there is generally someone who steps forward and talks about their demons or whatever - that the way they appeared on stage was not how they were continuously.

With Belak every single person who knew him is shocked. Nobody can reconcile this with the person they knew.

It seems tough to keep that up while playing so many years on nhl teams, locker room talk, practice, media... I didn't know him so my shock may be understandable, to hear it from many inside the game is a little heart breaking. I agree with you.

I just wish someone had been around to get him through a dark moment like that ( well if he wasn't, hurm, 'misadventuring' ) it's just a sad loss.

 

[leafplasma]

So difficult, the haunting myriad of emotions that must have been flooding through this poor man's head seconds before the end.  He had to love his family more than anything, he didn't hide that, what he did hide was the torture that so gripped his very core that nothing else mattered in the moments leading up to this.

Wade we may not understand, but we forgive you.  Unless we are in the place you must have been, we cannot judge, we can only hope that the courage you displayed on the ice for us the fan has been passed down to your dear family in these desperate times ahead.  Thank you for the moments, if at times it seemed to you that your life failed to matter, please believe us when we say that those thoughts could be the furthest from the truth.  May God bless your troubled soul.

 

[Corn Flake]

The thing about comedians and their darker side is that after the fact there is generally someone who steps forward and talks about their demons or whatever - that the way they appeared on stage was not how they were continuously.

With Belak every single person who knew him is shocked. Nobody can reconcile this with the person they knew.

It seems tough to keep that up while playing so many years on nhl teams, locker room talk, practice, media... I didn't know him so my shock may be understandable, to hear it from many inside the game is a little heart breaking. I agree with you.

I just wish someone had been around to get him through a dark moment like that ( well if he wasn't, hurm, 'misadventuring' ) it's just a sad loss.

Belak obviously had a reputation of being a light hearted fun guy who lit up a room and always had a joke , etc etc... basically someone people came to expect to be "happy".

Sometimes expectations like that can force people to play a part even when they've got issues they are dying to talk about, but feel they can't for fear of letting people down.  It sounds like teams he played on almost leaned on him to be that guy all the time.  If he had stuff haunting him, it would be even tougher for him to ever admit something was wrong.

Who knows, just a theory... but I've seen it several times with people in my life.  Many crashed and burned after years of trying to be the rock solid one that everyone looked up to and leaned on.  One ended up in suicide. 

 

[cw]

Feschuk: Belak silently suffered from depression, sources say
http://www.thestar.com/article/1048235--feschuk-belak-silently-suffered-from-depression-sources-say

That article might provide a little credible insight though even his good friend Landsberg, who has spoken out publicly about his own battles with depression, spoke with him the day before, had no idea and was shocked.